Endless Void

You’re running and running and running. There is no starting or ending point. Keep running. You look above and see endless floating clouds. They are like an endless mirror. When you look above, you see yourself even though you don’t see yourself. You look at the ground, and you see plain ground. Then you look left and then you look right. As far as your eyes go, you realize this weird phenomenon is just like you. It has no start, even if it does, you can’t see it. It also doesn’t have any clear end, even if your vision isn’t strong enough to see it. It’s like a giant mirror where you can see your reflection. Instead of thinking about your appearance or aesthetics, all you care about is desperately finding the start and end of the void. It’s uncertain, and the tension is making you desperate. The tension is making you panicked, and you’re sweating to cope. Girl, just scream as hard as you can, even if you can't hear the echo here. Because it's only you and the endless maze. Your shoes are wearing off, and your legs are shaking. You call those familiar names desperately: Diana, Megan, Sophia, Ava. Suddenly, you stop. Your legs are shaking badly, yet you somehow manage to hang on and gather your last physical power. You hear something foreign, and it’s pleasing. Well, even though it’s mixed with despair and hope. You hear a familiar laugh of the person whose name you just thought of. Then you realize they are just being themselves. They aren’t looking for you or searching for you. They are just being themselves. You don’t know where they are or how to beg them to show you direction and make you feel relieved. Suddenly, you feel a sharp pain in your knee. You have fallen on the ground on your knees. It is bleeding red, but the bizarre part is you did not realize how your legs acted without will. Now your legs stop working, but the panic and weird urge are telling you to keep going. Now, after preparing your mind, you start crawling. Your chest is burning from friction. Your skin cannot hold it. For the past 24 hours, you’ve been seeing the same sight. The same sky and the same ground are all you have. Your legs are completely numb, as if they’re not part of your body. Suddenly, you fall facedown. After being numb for seconds, you realize the only thing in your body that is willing to work is your hands. The panic is so insane that your eyes widen, and you groan and scream your lungs out. The silence makes your brain even more desperate, and intrusive thoughts start piling up. Again, a miracle happens. You hear Ava laugh. Again, you scream, and as a reply, you get Megan’s happy scream. That makes your brain go crazy, and the fear of missing out and frustration make your intrusive thoughts stronger. You either want to rip yourself apart or want to take Ava and Megan’s happiness. With all the bottled up rage, you have to go forward. Now all you have are your hands. By using them, you start dragging your whole body. Time is passing, and your energy is now almost over. Your eyes are barely open, and you are fighting to keep them open and energetic. More hellish hours pass. You have done so much, yet you are still in the same sky and ground. Suddenly, you see your vision getting narrow, and all you see is white smoke. Yes, smoke. More smoke, more smoke. You start sobbing, but it’s all in your head. The body is so fragile that crying feels like lifting the Earth on your shoulders. All that’s left to do is watch the surreal smoke devour you slowly and gently. It’s confusing whether the weird phenomenon feels gentle because it really is or because your body can’t feel the brutality. Now your eyes are barely open, and random, vague, and liminal thoughts start occupying your mind. Are you in this state because you pushed yourself too much, or is it your mind? Did you run, or is your mind playing with your thoughts? Did this smoky situation start a few hours ago, or was it forever? Is it you or your mind? Some serious and confusing questions never have a start or end, just like your mind and you. You don’t know where it all started or where it will end. Your eyes are closed, yet it all feels like ending where you started.